Absolutely Awesome Bitter Truth

2 days orientation, 6 days of World of Management, 6 days of real class.

I feel like I’ve been here forever! In a good way. Going back to school is fun. The people, the kiasu-ness, the friendships, the constant challenges, the insecurities, the little triumphs and many more. Living in a city where you don’t have to sit in traffic for two hours a day is also a lot of fun. Being able to run in open air with plenty of trees and greens right by the city scrapers is absolutely amazing. As I did another lap at Flagstaff Garden today, my mind somehow drifted to this sentence that I never quite get. “I can’t live without you. I don’t know how to be happy without you.” It still pains me to hear such words coming from… well, anybody! Yea sure I got my share of rejections in the past, and for moments I did feel like the world came to a screeching halt. Those days everything goes in slow motion and every detail bring out bittersweet memories. Been there, done that, and hey ho life goes on. Just like one guy did actually say to my face “In three weeks time you won’t even remember me at all!” Well, well. Ain’t he a smart cookie. Indeed now that I look back, he was just a little itsy tiny blip in my constellation, which is probably what I was in his universe.

Flagstaff. Running. Yes. As I was huffing and puffing and looking at my surroundings, I saw huge trees such as ones you’d find in Winnie the Pooh picture books, clear pale blue sky not unlike of the Simpson’s variety and pretty flowers and bushes you feel like you’re in a Disney movie. Though I’ve said many times that whenever I experience beauties of the nature, I have a deep urge to share it with somebody, the fact remains that I do not stop enjoying them. The very fact that I experience such awesomness (do humor me with the existence of such word) alone does not stop me from thanking God that I was there being bombarded by multitudes of beauties from all my senses. And oh how I praise Him and glorify Him for his creation. Will it be better if there’s someone there who I can hug it out with? Hell yea. It will be uber awesome. But will I sulk and whimper in pain without such close presence? I dare not my friend, I dare not. For it’s a costly thing to do as you close yourself up, thinking the world is all about you and that the universe is there just to make your unrequited love do a 180 degree on you. While it is nice if the universe had aligned its starts to make you and your object of desire happen, that’s just not on its agenda contrary to what your horoscopes may tell you.

Bitter truth. A medicine best taken in one quick chug and probably plenty of anesthesias. But once your drowsiness disappear, the aching heart stops pounding and the blood start flowing again, you’ll finally realize that the world is much, much, much greater than yourselves. And it’s abso-effin-lutely awesome!



About inifeli

Sketch a lot, write a lot, read a lot. Live a lot.

Well, I'd say....

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